My apologies to anyone irked by the asterisk, but I never know who's Googling their way to this site. Anyway, this is just about the most famous poem on parenting, or at least it should be.
This Be the Verse
Philip Larkin
They f*ck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.
But they were f*cked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another's throats.
Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don't have any kids yourself.
Great, Anne! This poem always makes me laugh my * off.
Posted by: Deb Clark | June 09, 2006 at 10:44 AM
I do not find it funny, it is sad but true, I guess the last line is the hard one for me. I did put off having children because of the poor parenting skills of my mother. I have since found that I am a good mother inspite of my own. Thanks for sharing Anne, I had not seen this before and thought wow!
Posted by: Tally | June 09, 2006 at 11:13 AM
Deb: It actually took me a second to get that. Brain's not in gear today. Doh.
Tally: Wow, I guess I didn't expect anyone to have that reaction. Yes, I think Larkin was making a serious point under the humor or it wouldn't be so memorable.
As someone who also put off having kids until my late '30s, I totally sympathize with your feelings of reluctance. I do think we older Moms have an advantage over our mothers with greater self-awareness and wisdom.
Thanks for stopping by.
Posted by: Anne | June 09, 2006 at 12:43 PM
I've been thinking about this poem a lot lately as I angst about how I'm probably f*cking up my own kid despite my best efforts. So this is very timely; thanks, Anne!
Posted by: elswhere | June 09, 2006 at 06:11 PM
Elswhere: It's in our DNA to think that. I try (usually in vain) to believe I'm not. Heavy sigh.
Posted by: Anne | June 09, 2006 at 08:07 PM
Phillip Larkin has done it again!
Posted by: Gung Ho | June 10, 2006 at 05:25 PM