It seems everyone has a title these days: Stay-at-Home Mom, Stay-at-Home Dad, Empty Nester.
As I wait for my wife's delayed plane at Sky Harbor Airport in Phoenix, I wonder what I should call myself. I'm not really a SAHD because I'll be working full-time from home. And I can't call myself a traditional working dad because I will be cloistered in my newly-set up home office.
Perhaps I should call myself a Work-At-Home Dad, which leads to the unfortunate acronym, WAHD. Since there already is a website called WAHD Central and some blogs that use the term, I guess I'm stuck with the name.
Even though I'm still more moving in than working from home at this point, I'm already learning what it means to be a WAHD. Getting a 3- and 6-year old to understand they must stop whacking each other on the head with stuffed animals while I'm on a conference call has not been easy.
Transitioning several times a day from Communications Director to supportive, ego-boosting dad is not so easy for me, either. I tend to be mission-centric and get uncomfortably cranky at repeated changes in direction.
But already I'm seeing the upside. My kids are getting outdoors more and they're beginning to see me as someone they live with rather than that guy who comes home for dinner and a night's sleep.
So for now, I'm happy to call myself a WAHD. And perhaps my little experiment in mixing career with personal life will help others desperate to escape the prison Americans call work.
Sent from my BlackBerry wireless handheld.
I don't know about these acronyms... SAHD, WAHD... they sound so depressing.
"I'm sad! Waaaaaaahd!"
Oh well.
Posted by: Phil | Wednesday, July 30, 2008 at 01:30 AM
Man, I can just picture it.
You frantically waving at the children, trying NOT to hit the MUTE button or give away your distress. Then one the topic changes, MUTE and "stop doing that!!"
Good luck!
Posted by: Summer | Wednesday, July 30, 2008 at 04:11 AM
Our biggest life saver has been having a dedicated office room with a door that locks. We both work from home pretty frequently and would not survive without one or two lockout sessions a day for the phone calls.
Posted by: Mike | Wednesday, July 30, 2008 at 05:16 AM
Phil: They are kind of silly.
Summer: I think I told one ad rep to stop hitting his sister. He was very confused.
Mike: I suppose I could block the door with weights, but my kids are young enough that I have a "need" to intervene. In one incident, Seth was pushing Lael down the staircase.
Words I commonly hear out of my mouth: "My kids love each other to DEATH."
Posted by: brettdl | Wednesday, July 30, 2008 at 06:03 AM
I've done the WAVING and SNAPPINg at the kids when they come in while I'm in the middle of a conference call. Yeah..it's not pretty. But now before a call I just let them know that I'll be unavailable for a bit and I'll let them know when they can come in. They understand now...
Posted by: Grace | Wednesday, July 30, 2008 at 08:00 AM
I'm going with WAHSAHD...work at home stay at home dad. I start my self-employment from home/at home with the girls on 8/22.
I can totally relate to the conference call thing, managing that mute button is a skill!
Posted by: Jeff - OutWithTheKids | Wednesday, July 30, 2008 at 08:25 AM
Grace: So far, advanced warning is sort of like a magic button that says, "hey, let's make noise NOW." I'm sure the kids will learn over time, though.
Jeff: Ah, the mute button. For some reason, mine doesn't work! I will have an IP phone soon, which will help.
How about this acronym: SAHDWWTTADALOL: Stay-At-Home Dad Who Works There Too And Does A Lot of Laundry?
Posted by: brettdl | Wednesday, July 30, 2008 at 09:27 AM
Judith Warner of the NYT has an interesting article about parenting and values.
http://warner.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/07/31/camp-codependence/?8dpc
Posted by: John Rothschild | Friday, August 01, 2008 at 10:12 AM
I hate to admit it, but Warner is spot on. Sharks breed sharks; I have met multiple generations of them.
Posted by: brettdl | Friday, August 01, 2008 at 02:26 PM
I was a WAHD once. I loved it. Now I work 9 hours a day + a 1.5 hour commute. Not loving it so much.
Many people don't seem to understand that while my kids are still small, it's important (for them and me) to be together more, not less.
I bet that your entire family will thrive from this opportunity. WAHD power to you.
I love this post so much, I'm submitting it to the next Tops in Pops blog carnival at Daddy Brain.
Peace,
babbo
www.daddybrain.wordpress.com
Posted by: babbo | Monday, August 04, 2008 at 11:10 AM
Thanks! And I hope you can find a job that requires less commuting!
Posted by: brettdl | Monday, August 04, 2008 at 01:28 PM