The adventurous herbivore

very now and then I must devote a post to the endlessly beige span of desert known as the Inland Empire, since this is nominally what my blog's about, and it helps in the occasional non-porn Google search.

I live in a part of the world known for its cancerous growth -- the fastest in North America, if the newspapers are to be believed. More articulate and smarter people (who generally don't live here, almost by definition) can tell you all about what problems that generates. I care about all of them, but not right now.

Right now, I'm concerned that this population boom means my corner of the world now has the lowest per capita rate of vegetarian restaurants in all of herbivorous California. This is shocking.

Even though I've joined the legions of leaf eaters, I'd like to have the occasional culinary adventure just like other civilized people who throw caution and lower dress sizes to the wind. Imagine my delight upon hearing there is a vegetarian Chinese restaurant in my town. With some pluck and help from a site called the Happy Cow, I found Veggie Way (formerly Panda Wok) less than 3 miles from my humble, meat-free abode.

Last night, we ventured there, keeping our expectations low, which turned out to be wise. First, we had to find the strip mall, nearly indistinguishable from all the other fading, litter-strewn wrecks with gaping vacancies and cracked blacktop. We found it wedged between the Liquorama and a nail spa. Doesn't that tell you everything you need to know?

The restaurant was your typical greasy spoon, with a few creaky tables, dim lighting and crimson Japanese lanterns. A mirrored wall kept the baby busy most of the evening, and a TV console broadcast Chinese religious programming with English subtitles: "Find the person who knows God and let him enlighten you!"

Sure. Right after I finish my egg rolls.

We seemed to be the only people over 30 there, which meant we were also the only ones whose every last inch of flesh hadn't been given over to tattoos and piercings. It never fails to amaze me how many holes the human body can sport without leaking.

We shared chicken-less chow mein noodles and curried vegetables. I didn't die. Minitaur ate his customary brown rice and steamed tofu. You read that correctly. This is what my son has eaten in every Asian-themed restaurant he's ever been in, though sometimes it's soba noodles instead of rice. Poor kid. I've pretty much ruined him, haven't I?

As we ate, others filtered in who didn't seem as threatening: two gay college kids, a middle-aged European couple, and a few others of non-Anglo ethnicity. You would never have noticed any of them if we didn't live in Vacuous Fatso Land. Most people seemed in a good mood, especially the gay couple, who were all giddy with young love.

It took a while for the two women behind the counter to warm to us. We were clearly the interlopers here, us middle-class family types wearing jeans and sweaters and without any visible bodily alterations.

It isn't exactly our piece of Santa Monica or Laguna Beach, but it's not terrible, which is about what you expect in our part of the world. Sad, I know, but until someone offers one of us a job in a less carniverous part of the country, this is what we get. 

Comments

[plosh]

I used to think the Midwest was strange until I moved here.

On the other hand, compared with the greasy local chinese cuisine, this stuff was pretty darned good.

[Ontario Emperor]

I actually know those strip malls between San Antonio and Mulberry. When I first moved to California in 1983, I lived one block north of them. No veggie places during the year that I lived in the area, but I think Liquorama's been there forever, and I know that the "Hi Brow Lounge" has been there for decades. I still use the dog groomer there.

The late Linda McCartney would not be amused, but I never have really taken to veggie food. Tried a Gardenburger once at Coco's and hated it. While I shouldn't judge an entire cuisine (actually multiple cuisines) by that one experience, I'm still not willing to run out and can the meat.

[plosh]

Ummm, I wouldn't go to Coco's for my first vegetarian experience. I would expect the chef to be thinking, yeah, right, I'll teach that pinko wimp something and mash the peelings that fell on the floor into a "garden burger."

[Gooch]

I don't have the limitation of vegetarianism going against me, yet I have to agree one of the biggest drawbacks of living in the IE for me has been the dearth of good restaurants. More specfically, the lack of interesting restaurants with local flavor and personality, restaurants that are not Chili's, Applebees, Macaroni Grill or TGIFridays.

I hate to sound like a snob, but the lack of taste of some of our neighbors is just astounding. My wife and I went out to a wonderful Japanese fusion restaurant last Saturday night, which one would assume would be a big night in the restaurant business. Instead the place was practically empty, leaving little hope for its long-term survival (it was empty the last time we went there too) Yet the Red Robin neighboring the place had a line out the door.

[Anne]

Gooch: You put your thumb right on it. Plosh and I go nuts trying to find decent eats in this area. Even Claremont, a college town, has only a handful of not-mediocre restaurants, and they're overpriced for the relative quality.

Let me know where the fusion Japanese place is -- they probably have a few veggie selections on the menu and I'd like to get there before they go under.

[Ontario Emperor]

Gooch's comment triggered some thoughts in my brain. Even I, who am not completely offended by corporate power, am starting to get disgusted at the exacting sameness of nearly every mall around here. I wasn't up in arms went Starbucks entered downtown Claremont, but I can picture the day in which downtown Claremont has a Quiznos next to a Cold Stone next to a Panda Express next to a Rubio's.

[Anne]

OE: Shudder. It's one of the things I objected to about the new Victoria Gardens mall too. Sure, it's perdy, in a sterile kind of way, but underneath the faux '50s facades it's the same same same.

[plosh]

I'm just going to say it: I hate the Inland Empire.

[Gooch]

Anne, the restaurant is called Yen. It's in Temecula on Winchester Road, near the mall, so it may be a bit of a drive.

OE, I'm not anti-corporate either, but I also find it depressing how homogenized all the cities in the Inland Empire and beyond are becoming. I swear, you could blindfold me, and drive me from my house in Temecula all the way out to Victorville and I'm not sure I'd even realize I had left since once my blindfold was removed I'd see the same Red Lobster, Best Buy, Target, Starbucks, Lowes...

[Ontario Emperor]

It's not just the IE. I'm seeing it in the OC, in Henderson Nevada, in Arlington Virginia...even in San Francisco.

[Anne]

It's a phenomenon chronicled by New Urbanists and other suburban critics, such as James Howard Kunstler in his "Home from Nowhere."

Unfortunately, when dimwit planners in places like Rancho Cucamonga decide to do New Urbanism, they simply come up with another mall.

[plosh]

At least when they built The Grove in Los Angeles, they put real housing above the stores. At Victoria Gardens, they put in FAKE apartments.

[Jack]

I can't give up meat, I am a happy carnivore.

[robin]

I don't know if this helps or not -- probably not much -- but the corporatization is over here in London, too. There's a Starbucks on every corner and we get the added angst of having many Europeans think all Americans actually like Starbucks coffee, and are therefore as a nation foisting it upon them in a rush of corporate imperialism. The "high street" phenomenon is our equivalent of the "strip mall"... the same Oasis, TopShop, Miss Selfridges, Habitat, Next, Monsoon, and so on.

But the grass is always greener - the other day I saw, listed on ebay.co.uk, a set of 15 paper take-out menus from various resturants in a California suburb, being enthusiastically bidded up by various people in the UK. So everyone and every place is exotic to someone!

[Anne]

Oh Robin, that's just tragic. I have such fond memories of all that's unique about London, from the pubs to the wine bars, tea shops and the much-mourned Reject China Shop. Sigh.

[Robin]

Oh, don't worry, that's all still there too. You just have to look harder -- or farther out of town -- for it. When're you coming to visit, anyway? I want to meet the little people.

[Ontario Emperor]

To Robin: we've hosted several exchange students over the years, and have found that a number of exchange students who end up in Southern California love Mexican food by the time their stay is over. So we sent two of our former exchange students t-shirts and sipper cups from Don Jose's (an Inland Empire-Orange County Mexican restaurant chain) for Christmas. If I hadn't found those, I was considering sending In N Out burger accessories. (And no, I won't say what they do to In N Out Burger bumper stickers; this is a family blog, after all.)

Anne, I will investigate Kunstler and New Urbanists.

[Anne]

OE: Click on the blog Veritas et Venustas to your left. He's a New Urbanist architect who was on the team appointed by the Mississippi governor to redesign communities along New Urbanist lines after Katrina. They're also getting their eager paws on New Orleans. Should be exciting stuff.

Robin: I'd be there tomorrow if we could!